Fly American from Bellingham to Philadelphia

How delightful it is to embark on a sojourn off the beaten path from Bellingham, Washington to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania! After sipping my umpteenth cup of organic, single-origin, ethically sourced, hand-roasted, drip-brewed, naturally decaffeinated Seattle coffee, I gaze thoughtfully at my laptop screen. I’ve been caught in the vast and bewildering labyrinth of online air travel, navigating a path through flights, airfares, and flight cancellation policies as I plan out my journey.

I'm giddy with pleasure as I watch colorful bar-graphs and pie charts popping up before my eyes, like a Katy Perry Super Bowl halftime show. I silently congratulate the genius who invented these nifty 'best time to book' indicators. They really know how to make one's nerve endings tingle!

Like an archeologist discovering a buried treasure, I locate the ‘Connecting flights’ tab hidden among the catacombs of the airline website. Bellingham to Philadelphia, a journey worthy of Odysseus himself! Direct flights are out of the question, non-stop is nonexistent, and red-eye flights are as hard to find as a hipster without a Netflix subscription. Point being, in no world should this journey be easy or straightforward.

Having girded myself with patience - a trait as essential as the cardamom in your chai latte - I eventually find the ‘Round-trip’ routes. Eureka! The round trip might be longer than a Tolstoy novel, and take my breath away like a price-tag at a Beverly Hills boutique, but I press on.

There goes the former ‘City of Subdued Excitement’ behind as I step onto the precipice of adventure, gripping my modest baggage allowance in hand. My destination? The ‘City of Brotherly Love’, Philadelphia. Flying with American Airlines, not Everyday Joe's Door-to-door Drone Delivery service. We're going retro, people!

Are they offering business class and first-class options? Sure, but who feels the need for such decadence when 'Economy Class' is within my grasp? Premium Economy, ha! For someone who knows the joys of intermingling with seasoned travelers, crying infants, and armrest invaders, Economy is the only way to fly. Not to forget the opportunity to save a full year’s salary by simply choosing a more humble abode in the air.

And now, to my fellow economy-class dwellers, I bestow wisdom. I promise you the 'one-way' ticket to travel savvydom when you go American Airlines: Join their 'mileage program', my friends. Nothing will push you to the zenith of coolness as you recline in your adjustable 13.3-inch wide seat, collecting points as you traverse the country. After all, who wouldn't want more 'Frequent flyer' perks than an espresso has caffeine?

No, my fellow traveler, this isn’t your predictable, Tristram Shandy-like 'Flight schedule' coupled with an unpredictable ‘Flight cancellation policy’. But it’s nothing that the Post-Graduate in Travel and Delay Management, which we all apparently need, wouldn't solve. Thus, in its capacity to amaze, confuse, and amuse, the American Airlines website is a microcosm of American life itself.

And how to sum up such an expedition? A meticulously planned 'Layover', each calculated 'Flight duration', the mystique, the wonder, the palpable excitement. They might even throw in random comedy - in-flight service of lukewarm coffee anyone? Served lovingly by a flight attendant so cheerful, it makes you question your life choices and why you opted for 'Cheap flights'.

Bukowski said: 'We don't even ask happiness, just a little less pain'. But hey, if room-temperature caffeine bust doesn’t snatch bliss from the jaws of despair, I’m not sure what will! Just remember fellow traveler, it’s not about flying, but how you approach the flight!