Fly American from Honolulu to Punta Gorda

Alright, all you adventurous, flight-booking, frequent-flyer demi-gods out there. Prepare to embark on your red-eye flight from the flower-stuffed, hula-dancing, instagrammably millennial vacation playground known as Honolulu, Hawaii, and buckle in for the funniest, most enjoyable plane ride of your life – all the way to the 'Garden of Eden' Florida's finest, Punta Gorda. Yes, I said it. Yes, we're serious.

First things first - What's the flight duration, you ask? Well, pretend you're binge-watching the entire three seasons of Friends, throw in a couple of bathroom breaks and some cheeky trips to the snack fridge and then you're there, although I wouldn't stake my entire frequent flyer mileage program on this estimate.

However, let's get the elephants out of the room, folks. Here they come...Boom! Airfare - Ugh, right? Second elephant called bag allowance. Look, everyone and their mother's Chihuahua knows, we can't outsmart these two. Think of it this way - American Airlines is like a caloric-conscious supermodel, it only allows skinny suitcases on her catwalk. But, we've got something going for us that those suitcases don’t – our winning personalities… and occasional hilariously embarrassing experiences with the in-flight beverage service.

I know, I know, you're thinking, 'Come on, shouldn't I just book a direct flight and avoid all the trauma of dragging my luggage through some obscure airport at the crack of dawn?'.

Whoa! Hold your horses, cowboy! Where's your sense of adventure? Don't be a one-way kind of traveler. Embrace the layover, bask in the chaos of connecting flights, appreciate the myriad challenges that make your journey a memorable one. You know what they say, "It's not about the destination, it's the journey, and the airline food, and the personal drama that enfolds in the cabin that makes a round-trip worthwhile."

Or maybe they don’t say that, it might be my saying. Successful patent pending… or perhaps just scribbled on a bar napkin somewhere.

Business class, indeed, snappy and sassy! But remember, good times don’t always come with a hefty price tag. If you're an economy class stalwart like I am, then there's always the chance of a humorous upgrade. You know, the one where they move you up because that guy with an uncanny resemblance to Chewbacca from Star Wars has decided he needs both his seat…and yours.

And when it comes to the best time to book? There's an incalculable number of theories about that - you could consult the lunar calendar, take a wild guess, or just whenever you finally get your act together and commit to an itinerary. But, all professional thumb-twiddling aside, a good rule of thumb could be to book approximately 47 days and 6 hours prior to departure… or not.

Last-minute flights? Truly, that’s the exact dose of adrenaline you need to start off your voyage - gambling on availability in a thrilling race against time, and yet still cheaper than paying for a movie ticket these days, right? We'd probably give it a shot, just not at the risk of being stranded in Honolulu.

So, there you have it, fellow globetrotters, the ultimate guide to flying American from Honolulu, Hawaii to Punta Gorda, Florida. May the frequent flyer miles be ever in your favor, and remember not to take the air travel too seriously, it's supposed to be the fun part, remember?